New Album

The Obstacle is the Way

Self-written, self-produced, self-mixed, and self-sacrificed with self-sweat and self-tears.
The continued journey of self-actualization found through artistic expression. Music undeniably makes life better; for some of us, it makes living possible. The path is clear: Acknowledge who you are, and practice the art of expressing yourself. It may not be easy, but it is both your life’s work and your greatest gift. Acknowledge your art!

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The Card Game

I've forgotten what started this game to be honest
But regardless I'm always all in, deal the cards then
Flip em over, oh well nothing but jokers
But hold up are jokers wild or no luck?

No ace up my sleeve neither
No beaters no keepers
No freecard sweeteners
Fair player, but whose the dealer?

Do I even know how to play
Were there rules? Did I read them?
Is anybody else even in
This game I'm perceiving?

Did I conceive this up in my head
How much money have I bet?
For luck and upsets
Busts and much debt

With no said competitors
Who have no wages
How is there a game
When your the only one playing

You're the croupier, you can stop the game
There is no win or loss
Nothing to prove
Put down the cards and walk away.

Personality Disorder

INFJ, ENFP, 
ISTP,
ADHD, MDMA,
MIA, ASAP

Eventually I blend in
With whatever you need me to be
Seamlessly, revealing characters
I'm yet to actually meet

My demeanor, shows up believable
While completely leaving myself
Of everything, authenticity
Briggs & Meyers can't pin me down

Crossing wires, twisting, tossing seeds
Scattered lost and knotted weeds
Helplessly harvesting
Parts of me not for the reap

Taking shots in the dark
Throwing darts, tossing paint on the wall
Nothing has stuck yet
Ends up chipping and warped

So I'm starting the restoration
The process of cleaning my closet
Yet it's so deep with hallways
And dead ends and cobwebs

And I'm starting to perspire a bit
Because half this shit is on fire
I require retardants
That cause their own problems mesotheliomas

Can't see, can't focus
I can barely breath, I'm choking
Holding my breath
Through the smoldering wreckage I have set

On myself to suffer through
An utter cluttered chaos
Not knowing if I'm suffering
A thousand deaths or just one

Death of ego or something
I've never fully understood the subtleties
But underneath this rubble
May be a young seed

One I will nourish and cultivate
With understanding and loving through and through
Colorfully
I can show up to this world fully bloomed.

EverGreen Ever Grateful

When you really need someone to listen
Speak with the coniferous
I don't mean that symbolically
I mean honestly talk with conviction

Other people aren't always
Fitted for the worthy position
And the ones who just might get it
Will still insist on their opinions

The arbor has wisdom
That we didn't know existed
Until we sit with it
Against it's nourishing steadiness

With assistance in it's persistence
Omit within stillness
The occasional creak
Lilting in the wind it acknowledges us

It's giving with willingness
To shelter and shade
Fresh air biofiltration
The framework for warmth and written communication

Nature graciously sent us these sentients
As sentinels
Stoically overlooking as kinfolk
With such strength sturdy, yet so gentle

Evergreen ever grateful.

Course Correction

Am I supposed to takeover
It seems whenever I begin
Whatever is already in motion
Begins to tremble with the wind

When I'm in the cockpit
Trying to steer fearful and stiff
Shifting gears, course correcting
Through thick fog and turbulence

Preparing to land on the skids
Heading for canopy covered ridges
Can't ditch now amid tailwinds
All I can do is commit

And prepare for impact
How do I end up in this position?
I was securely intact
Now I'm spinning like whirligigs

Gripping the instructors booklet
Which is just as gibberish
If it was written in hieroglyphics
Why so ambiguous

Inhaling with shallow breath
Gasping ready for wreckage
A test dummy strapped in
An expendable lemming

But do I ever actually crash
Is there actually anything wrong
Just because It's out of my control
Doesn't mean all is lost

If I just relax, trust the flow
Notice whats fine all along
Finally conscious
There was no need to course correct at all.

Reciprocity

Reciprocity, give and receive often
That's our philosophy
Or at least it ought to be
The common theme ideology

We're not without the offering
The generosity of all we see
Someone worked long and hard
To provide the things you often need

They wrought to the bone
Worn heart and soul
At what cost, what was lost
Hopefully we'll know the toll

Ethology, anthropology
Various studies composited
Probably don't fully perceive
The level of effort exhausted

Hardships and woes
Roles earned and lost and molded
We've all participated
Not as individuals but as a whole

Billions of years totaled
Billions of years to go
Wholly easy to be lost in the fold
But you're woven into whats sewn

Loving Seeds Sustain

I let them get to it I did
I thought I was unsusceptible yet
They got me nonchalantly
I folded like origami

What taught me I might be immune
Because I got infected so soon
Full blown sepsis seeped in
Who knew the depths that it intrudes

Disingenuous cultivators
Planting the seed that grew
Into a weed an invasive species
That sullies what else could bloom

But it's not true this knot weed
Is caught in a rock and a hard place
Often only the most hardened
Gnarled vines can sustain

But in the soil there lays
In place a seed with grace
That does not go away
In the root of you ingrained

Some day it my bloom through
The concrete, the pavement
The urban landscape we've made
Loving seeds of nature finds a way.

Downtrodden Commonplace

Start the day sharpish
Emphasis on "ish" basis
A bit of honest daily defiance
To the trials and tribulations

Yet we raise up regardless
Armed and ready for combat
Another day of marching
Into the colosseum match

Monarchs doubt it's a battle
Since we haven't the scars to show
Outwardly ones at least
Because inside they always grow

And we grow dreary and weak
Though wearily keep serving
We crawl into the trenches
The nitty gritty dirt surface

Downtrodden upon the earth
And the ones who purge above
Earls, dukes, and barons
Keep shoveling on the mud

Barren at the bottom barrel
That's our commonplace
How do we rise to face
Each day when we're trying to save face

This rat race maze
Wandering in place
They way out is to honor those we wander with
Reconciliate

Congregate and accommodate
Corroborate and cooperate
Congratulate each other
For walking this honest pace.

Explain Yourself

They made me explain myself
I tried to deny
Held out for the longest time
But they pried and pried

So I resided
Tired and left spent, beside myself
A bit blindsided by incitement
So I described myself

Trying to illustrate
Define something I can't fully frame
Words don't just articulate
Ones inner landscape

Yet I prated and prattled along
With comical chaos
Consciously aware
Of my incoherent monolog

Obviously a lost cause
Which I've known all along, yet
Somehow I thought
I could make them comprehend

I was wrong, all lost on them
How they've got me pegged
Based on discrepancies
Fully lost in translation

Now they define who I ought to be
Foresaw they should foresee
My flaws and anxieties
To sell me on what I need

At no cost will I follow their lead
Keep your individuality
Just be who you are
No need to explain a thing to me.

Into The Overwhelm

Wearily governed by fear
Where is the love?
They are mutually exclusive
Too varied to be one

It's one or the other
Outsider or brother
Kin and kind or villain and rival
How you define them is yours to discover

People can be unrelated
Slated as enemies
Yet have the gentle tendency
To see humanity in each

We need recovery from purveyors
Of hatred and naysayers
Who restrain from change sake
Afraid of antiquation

So reshape the ways of old
Of broken credos and codes
Race and segregation
We're capable of changing basic norms

Being noble isn't nobility
It's humility
And willingly easing into you dis-ease
To release resistibility

The only thing to fear is fear itself
Lean into the overwhelm
Breach and show yourself
The love you've always held.